07/07/2026
Twice this past week I have found myself in conversations which confirmed what I have long argued: unless you are an exceptional operator, with more than one owner physically participating, it is incredibly difficult to make money from a cafe and like your life at the same time.
It’s why those who do it well deserve their flowers; looking at you , , .ontheesplanade.
Show me your new cafe venture, and I’ll show you burnout, the constantly shifting sands of underlying, unseen costs, and my personal favourite - cafe equipment - some of which you should spend the big money on for commercial grade, and the rest of which you should just buy the regular for-home stuff and save your pennies on but no I couldn’t tell you which are which because that is another constantly-evaporating-just-as-you-think-you’ve-grasped-it-enigma from The Land Of Cafe Ownership.
It’s a place where there’s nothing like a 6-day week of blistering hours, except perhaps the 7th day - always a Friday, weekend or public holiday - when you can be sure that one of the above-mentioned pieces of equipment will absolutely s**t itself. Faster than you can sob through an understanding of Technician Rates Outside Weekdays.
The competition for cafe patronage is fierce, and ferociously narrow margins are the result. Unless customer volumes are high, it’s going to be very hard to step out from behind that coffee machine sooner than 5 years in.
Which is not to say we don’t love our cafe.
Really, we do.
But we’re ten years in.
We have a side game.
Our systems are tight and our staff are perfection.
That takes time, gruelling time.
So sure; own a cafe.
But be prepared to love it looooong time through the years that it owns you.