N8KEDSecrets LLC

11/01/2024

Hey hey yall, I am back again as a panelist for Girl Talk. This time around we will be discussing the bounce back. I’m very transparent with my life because I strongly believe I can’t be shamed by anything that I’ve already lived through. From failed engagements, to failed businesses to many many more failures to come. Let’s talk about how the bounce back has always and will always be my greatest accomplishment 🥰 this is a live showing so get your tickets in advance while they’re $10.

Get ready for our next Girl talk: Women Who Bounce Back!👊🏾👊🏼👊🏽

Are you ready to be part of something transformational?😃

Do you have a story of resiliency, success and victory over hardship?💯

Then join the converation!🙋🏾‍♀️🙋🏼‍♀️🙋🏽‍♀️

Sunday, Nov 24th 6-9PM at Ink Therapy Studio. 🖊️

Tix on sale NOW at Eventbrite.🔥

Grab ur tix and bring a friend😌

See you soon!👀💃🏾🎤👇🏾

https://www.eventbrite.com/e/girl-talk-women-who-bounce-back-tickets-1050712548517?aff=oddtdtcreator
Lisa Evans Shamarah Thomas-Hutchins Jennah Lear N8KEDSecrets LLC

03/29/2022

There’s a lot of love in the hearts of those that are naturally genuine. We naturally love, we naturally give, we naturally want to aide those that we love. The unfortunate side of this is that we naturally never receive the same we give in return. We give love so effortlessly that it becomes a surprise when those whom we’ve given love to pushes us to the wayside. It often times leaves us wondering or scratching our heads trying to figure out what did we do wrong. It’s so easy to try and fix a piece of us when it’s not our puzzle piece that’s not fitting. We can’t fix them though, so it has to be us right? WRONG!! It’s not me, it’s not you, it’s not us, it’s them. Some things just aren’t meant to stick, some things are solely meant to teach you how to spot red flags and never let the same thing happen twice. It’s okay to love, it’s okay to care, it’s okay to feel. What it’s not okay to do is keep putting a bandaid over the way people treat you and/or have made you feel. Stop giving people the opportunity to hurt you twice, once they decide to hop the fence, make sure you put barbed wire across the top so that they can’t come back.

I can write a book about the people who left, but instead I’d rather enjoy my borrowed time with those who stayed.

03/07/2022

People often times put their short comings off on someone else because whelp there’s other way to put it, they are competing. What exactly are you competing for though? Really sit back and think about that. If your only end goal is to be better than the person before you, then you won’t get far. Unfortunately competition is built for you to be better than me, if your ultimate goal isn’t to be the best version of you then you won’t stand a chance on the playing field.

I’ve said it once before and I’ll say it until I can no longer form words. Looking at someone else and believing that you can be better than them is one way to purchase yourself a first class ticket to failure. Your goal should not be to see someone and want to be better than them. When you do that you’re only mimicking their path and not creating your own. You will follow right behind them in every error they’ve made because you don’t know their journey, you only know the outcome of their struggle. They may be at the best point of their lives and you are sitting there wondering how to out do a journey that you weren’t even a part of. Mean while the only reason you’re having these thoughts is because you feel that they are better than you and you don’t like that. It flusters your spirit. I won’t call you a “hater” because we’ve all been there, but I will call you a self doubter. Rather than looking at someone else’s mirror worried about their reflection take a newspaper and some windex to your own. Hate on that person, want to be better than that person, be in competition with that person. The only relationship goals, friendship goals, business goals, or life goals etc,.. that you should have are ones that are tailored to you. Wanting to be like someone else or better than someone else is the equivalent to wearing your moms old wedding dress expecting it to fit like a glove on you! It never will until you cut up the fabric and pave your own way.

02/28/2022

The self control and mental morality that comes into play with patience. Sometimes one could find themselves on the fence, becoming calculating, or even just out right ugly. It’s easy to give in and go blow for blow when you feel like your temperament is being tested. Though it’s tempting, is it really the best way to go? It’s a very difficult process to not vibrate as low as others around you. It’s even more difficult to understand that you will not be able to process the why behind others actions. One of the biggest lessons learned throughout life is actually pretty easy to acquire if you preserve yourself long enough. Incase you haven’t though, here’s a snippet:

Good hearted people are naturally good hearted people, they do not require defending, they do not require explanations, and every but is not perceived as an excuse. Good hearted people take accountability for their actions and move forward in acknowledgment with readiness to grow and become better. Good hearted people organically give peace and love with grace. The clear difference between one who is a good hearted person vs one they may pretend to be a good hearted person is actions. What do you see? Is there consistent chaos around this person or are they consistently the head of the chaos?

With that being said every saint was a sinner, do not take the callous approach of thinking you can one up someone because they rather love in peace rather than raise hell. You could be the one on the short end of the totem pole.

02/22/2022

You don’t go through things to say you went through them, you don’t go through things to have a story. Every fine detail of your life is setting you up for your purpose. The good, the bad, and the ugly.

If many people knew my back story they’d treat me differently, they’d ask more questions rather than make assumptions, and most of all many of them I’m sure would wonder how did I make it look so easy. From sexual abuse, physical abuse, child abuse, abandonment, and mental health issues. I’ve dabbled in each realm of trauma, yet I still believe that someone has it worst than me.

Don’t look into someone else’s testimony and try to receive the same outcome as them. We all go through different levels of pain/trauma and unfortunately no level of pain is worst than the next. Pain is pain it hurts no matter the source.

The only thing pain has in common is giving you the ability to decide how you will move forward with it. Is it easy to decide? No… Will you decide immediately? Absolutely not…. Do you need to decide? Yes! You didn’t choose trauma, it chose you, but now you have a choice. So what will it be, flight or fight?

I choose to fight, so that I can take some of you along with me.

02/18/2022

02/17/2022

Still creating, still crafting, still making my mark in fashion 💕

🅽8🅺🅴🅳🆂🅴🅲🆁🅴🆃🆂

02/16/2022

Closure is the biggest rip off known to peace and love. Today this may come as a little harsh for some, but the harsh reality is what helps us dig deeper into being one with self.

How many times have you had that one last final talk to try and wrap up your heart to match what your mind already knows? Did you know that by you doing that you’re actually opening the door for more of a disconnect?

Closure is just a way for the inflictor to continue inflicting because folks know exactly what they are doing when they do it. This is just their opportunity to put an excuse behind it. You being you of course will then make excuses for them so that you can have a reason to still deal with them.

There is no other way to say this, so with all do respect I hope you allow this to pe*****te you.

LEAVE THEY ASSES WHERE THEY STAND

We are all adults and as adults we know how we want to be treated, with us knowing how we want to be treated that’s the bare minimum blue print of how we should treat others. When you treat others less than what you’d accept from yourself, you know exactly what you are doing. To play devils advocate if you’re one of those people who has the mindset of “Well if it was me I wouldn’t care” yikes you’ve taken a first class seat in the realm of narcissism and quite frankly I wouldn’t want to be a passenger on that train anyhow.

Don’t read Into this wrong none of the feelings evoked from this post requires “fixing” just simply acknowledgment that closure is a silent way of saying I still want this.

Job, friend, family, relationship.

02/15/2022

Don’t ever wonder why it was easy for me to move forward, don’t ever think that multiple chances will be floating around in the wind, do not concern yourself why my tears haven’t drowned me, do not venture down the path of trying to figure out why I’m still standing after you hear my story.

This journey is mine, just as your journey will be yours. No matter the circumstances of how we get there the end goal should always be peace. I’m happy today, maybe tomorrow I’ll be sad, maybe in an hour I’ll be upset, or by Friday I’ll be exhausted. Despite what ever emotion presents itself when I come back down from it I will always be at peace

Emotions are mental
Peace is a choice
😘

02/14/2022

Isn’t it amazing how we all have this ability to be nurturing. Some are sympathetic in their nurturing approach, some are empathetic, but many lack one key component.

Compassion!

“Often times we are so wrapped up in trying to “fix” someone that we don’t actually allow them to grow through their process. To “fix” someone means that they are broken and to be fair none of us are ever actually broken. We all have gone through life’s practice flowing as we grow and through that system many of us have hit a few snags. Instead of allowing those minor kinks in the carpet to unravel the whole master piece we live with imperfections and call them little bumps.

Today I want to feed into those little bumps that need just a little bit of extra thread to make ones tapestry whole . Release that clenched muscle in your chest resting assured that I don’t want to heal you. I want to sit near by in a crowded room and simply be a presence to your process. I don’t feel where you’re coming from, I don’t know what you’ve been through, but my relentless desire to have compassion for your subtle shifts in this cluttered energy realm is inevitable. I SEE YOU

Close your eyes and just breathe letting my peaceful nature and compassionate energy guide you. Allow my kinetic capacity to touch you. Remember we are still just merely in a room and I am not of company to heal you. Why is it so hard to believe that a mere mortal can reach you without ever touching you, using a soft flow so sweet that it entraps you? It’s a connection through an encompassing world that was not sent to distract you. I’m simply here to hold your hand as you thread the needle that mends the flaws that you’ve been through. Supporting your elbows as you fight your wars, and kissing the fear that what’s out there can’t be yours. I am only here to aid you.

I did not travel this journey to heal you. I’m naturally here for those moments when your heart chakra gets cluttered and you look around to see if anyone noticed the subtle shift in your mood, I’ll be the force in the back of the room whispering in your ear ever so gently, I GOT YOU”

Poem

02/12/2022

Many times we find ourselves in this space of anguish when someone we loved and trusted doesn’t reciprocate the same energy in return. They always say when you point the finger there are three pointing right back at you and in this case you do have to hold yourself accountable.

At what point do we start facing these expectations? How do we stop ourselves from holding people at a standard that they’ve never really proved to be worthy of? A lot of my greatest life lessons have ended in me taking a long hard stare in the mirror and telling myself that I have to hold myself accountable for many of the circumstances that deemed unworthy of my time and energy.

How many times have you overlooked a red flag? How many times have you compromised yourself in the name of love and loyalty?

Does anyone really even have a solid definition behind the word loyalty? Or is it just something we say in order for us to be comfortable with the way we allow people to do us?

Let’s stop being loyal by default and start making each and everyone that we encounter show us why they are deemed honorable enough to even be in our peace.