11/18/2013
10 Things Every New Parent Should Know
1. You cannot spoil a child with love: So many new parents hear well-meaning people telling them that they are spoiling their baby by holding him and responding to his needs. But you cannot spoil a child with love. You can only spoil a child by giving the child stuff as a replacement for the time and attention that you are not able to give your child.
2. You should be responsive to your child's cries:Your baby does not need to exercise her lungs. She doesn't need to learn to self-soothe. What she needs are parents that understand that a baby's cry is her only way of communicating with you and she uses it to tell you that she needs something or that she needs you. It is important to respond to your baby's cries both to meet her most basic needs and to give her a sense of security that she will carry through life. Excessive crying can be harmful to babies. Another part of being responsive to your child is watching for cues (crying is the last cue - once the others have been missed!) to tell you when your baby is hungry and when she is tired. You don't need to implement a schedule for feeding and for sleep, you should watch your baby instead to determine when feeding and sleeping times should be.
3. Discipline means teach: New parents worry that they need to "discipline" their child. But often when they say discipline, they mean spanking or punishing. However, the word discipline means to teach. That is what parents need to do. They need to guide and teach their children. In the same way that we do not expect a first grader to learn calculus, it is important to understand what age appropriate behavior is and to shape your expectations of your child and your discipline (teaching) according to what a child can reasonably be expected to understand at any given age.
4. The World Health Organization recommends breastfeeding for 2 years or beyond: So many mothers think that they need to start weaning when their baby gets teeth. Or they need to wean when they introduce solid foods. Breastfeeding doesn't have to be all or nothing, it is possible to set limits or to partially wean, but still keep nursing in certain situations or at certain times of day.
5. Solid food is not recommended before at least 6 months: Over the years, the recommendation on when to introduce solid foods has changed. I was given pablum at 6 weeks. But today, experts recommend exclusive breastfeeding for the first 6 months, followed by slow introduction of solid foods. As explained in the link, this gives babies greater protection from illness and food allergies, it gives their digestive system time to mature, helps protect from obesity, and many other benefits.
6. Your doctor is not a parenting expert and usually not a breastfeeding expert: I hear of so many new parents that feel bad after they leave their doctors office. It isn't because their baby isn't healthy. It is because the doctor was giving them advice on parenting issues like how and where they baby sleeps, how they deal with night wakings, how they discipline their children, and so on. Even on issues that are medical issues, listen to your doctor but do your own research too and don't be afraid to get a second opinion.
7. You can sleep safely with your baby: There has been a lot of publicity about co-sleeping being dangerous.However, if you implement a few simple guidelines, then it can be safe to sleep with your baby and can even be safer than putting your baby in a crib in a separate room.
8. Obesity is going to be the biggest health problem facing our children's generation: They say fat is the new to***co, meaning it will have the greatest negative impact on the health of the next generation. We need to give our children a good head start by making the right choices about infant feeding to avoid obesity and then continue to feed our children healthy foods that are low in sugar and low in saturated fats.
9. Children need to connect with nature: When we were kids, we roamed the neighbourhood without our parents. We climbed trees, picked berries, played in the dirt, built forts, caught frogs, and had a great time. We learned about nature by being part of nature. Today, parents are scared to let their kids go out on their own, so that means they keep them inside. They watch TV, they play on the computer, they go to organized sports or other activities. But free outdoor play time is rarer and rarer. If parents don't want to let their kids roam unsupervised (I know I don't...not yet at least!), then they need to go with them and let their child take the lead. Let them play freely in nature. Let them touch nature. Let them get exercise and fresh air at the same time.
10. Keep your child rear-facing in the car for as long as possible: A lot of parents ask when they can turn their child around and then turn them around as soon as they have met the minimum guidelines for height, weight and age. However, you should keep your child rear-facing for as long as possible.