06/07/2026
This sweet momma reached out to me a few days ago with the kindest words… “God is so proud of you, friend” and it meant so much to me. I reached out to her and thanked her for that kind message, and I truly feel that we were both impacted in such a special way. We exchanged stories of our loss, our pain, and our joy and faith in Jesus. She wanted to share some of her story. 🤎
“I wanted to be a mom so badly. I’m in a painful waiting period while seeing all of my friends and family members expanding their families. When I finally did get my positive test, oh I was over the moon! About 2 weeks later, we found out there were two babies. I remember thinking, “God gave us double.” After all that waiting, it felt unreal. I didn’t even feel “lucky”, I felt blessed. 🥹 Not long after that, things started getting complicated. My hCG levels weren’t doing what they were supposed to do, and every appointment seemed to bring more questions than answers. 🥲 Eventually we were told that one of my babies heart stopped beating and my son had passed. We were heartbroken, but I was still holding onto hope for the other one. That was such a weird feeling… I was so heart broken to lose one of children but so grateful to still have one left. It was a feeling that I wouldn’t wish upon anyone. I felt so much guilt for feeling happy that one of my twins is surviving. Two weeks later, I went in for another ultrasound to check on my surviving twin. During that appointment, we found out my surviving twin heart stopped as well. I still had both babies in my womb. I was a walking grave.
Honestly, the infertility was hard, but losing them was a completely different kind of pain. It felt like I went from finally getting everything I’d prayed for to having it ripped away before I could even hold them. 💔 I finally held my babies on February 1st, 2026. They were 11 weeks when their little hearts stopped.
It’s still fresh, and I still miss them every day. They’ll always be my babies. But God has been faithful through all of it, even on the days when I was angry, confused, or just exhausted from grieving 🧸❤️🩹🪽
After losing my twins, my faith has just excelled tremendously! There is a famous quote going around that says, “I’d rather have earthly people tell me that I’m taking this Jesus thing too seriously than meeting my Creator and having Him tell me to depart from Him that He doesn’t know me.” I have two children in Heaven and I refuse to let anyone (or myself!) get in my way of seeing them again one day. 🤍 “
After loss we have a choice to run, to hide, to become like Lazarus in the tomb, or we can let God meet us in our grief and call us out to service. God didn’t design his children to feel this pain, of course it’s heavy. He wants to help you carry it. When Jesus says come out Lazarus, you come out of your tomb. You will see your babies again.
This mommas faith was so encouraging. And I hope other mommas out there find comfort in knowing they are not alone. It was an honor to hear her story, and to share some of that pain with her. You are more than your loss, more than your pain, more than the ability to have a child, you are a precious child of God!
As always, I want to hear your story. Sharing is how we keep our babies memories alive❤️.
