Dennis & Lottes Cykler

02/07/2026

30/06/2026

30/06/2026

25/09/2025

We are currently experiencing a drone attack in the bike shop. Things are slightly delayed due to every danish politician being busy taking "selfies where you look worried", all while investing billions in defence, and then not knowing what to do when critical infrastructure like bike shops or airports get attacked, by something that can be taking down with a stick being thrown.

Until the city is physically on fire, we will however keep servicing your bike, even though Dennis has a headache from the complete ineptitude of our leadership. He's also angry because he REALLY likes drones, and now they're being outlawed. Fu***ng. Idiots.

13/08/2025

Some absolute fu***ng monster has stolen the seat for our cargo-bike. Obviously Dennis is beyond pi**ed, especially because insurance doesn't cover anything because of a "DeDucTIblE". Mega cringe.

When we find the thief- and we swear to God we will find him- he won't be able to sit down anywhere, let alone in that seat.

Until that happens we're reduced to fixing bikes.

10/07/2025

Dennis is drinking Polish Redbull, and if you know anything about Poles, you know that their quality control is second only to every developed nation on earth, as well as most of Subsaharan Africa. Either a LOT of bikes will be fixed today, or Dennis will die.

Let's all hope.

05/07/2025

Dennis' beautiful little bundle brought her pet bearded dragon to work, and made him a jacket ♥️

02/07/2025

We're not rasing bi***es (gender neutral bi***es) at this bike shop, so this unseasonably hot weather's water fight is with the high pressure hose. Deathmatch until it's 1v1, winner takes all.

24/06/2025

Today Dennis got a visit from the police, because apparently it's "illegal" to use flashing blue lights on a bike for advertising purposes, and fixing bikes is not an "emergency".

They were also joined by Kanal 5/HBO's Poltijagt, so expect to see Dennis' stupid face on TV soon. This marks the 3rd time in 3 years Dennis is in the news, and frankly it's tiring.

26/05/2025

Dennis is working late on Italian bikes. They're like Italian women, that require a gentle, soft touch. Luckily for them, he's equipped with delicate, dainty women like fingers, to stirr them just right.

They're basically gonna be sq**rting when he's done with them, if you wanna get technical.

**rt **rtisoil