01/09/2026
And just like that… the “ber” months have f**king arrived! 🥳🍂🎃
My absolute favourite time of year. Give me all the cosy nights, crunchy leaves, Halloween and Christmas immediately! 🧡
This year feels a little bittersweet though. The summer holidays were supposed to be filled with adventures and days out with my girls, but instead my body decided to be an absolute f**king ar****le.
We’ve had to cancel weekend breaks and days out, and I’ve spent a large chunk of the summer feeling like complete s**t.
Thankfully, the intense nausea has finally f**ked right off 🙌🏻 and although I’m still not 100%, I’m definitely better than I was.
Now, usually this is the point where I’d decide I’m magically cured, run at life at approximately 100 miles an hour and immediately throw myself back into the day job, the business and the other 947 things I’m constantly juggling.
Not today, Satan.
I’m listening to my GP and, more importantly, my body. So I’m staying signed off the day job and giving myself the time to properly recover.
The hardest part? Accepting that having a poorly pancreas and an unpredictable sphincter is a lifelong condition that is completely out of my control.
And as a control freak… well, isn’t that a massive f**king inconvenience? 🙃
I already manage ME and Fibromyalgia, so I thought I’d reached my lifetime quota of health-related bu****it. Apparently, the universe said, “You know what? Let’s give her a poorly pancreas and a rogue f**king sphincter too. She looks like she’s coping.”
Cheers for that. You absolute bastard 🙄
On a much happier note, my incredible girls, Ruby and Esme, have been absolute f**king superstars. They’ve kept the page going while I’ve been in hospital and recovering, and tomorrow they’re both starting exciting new chapters.
✨ Ruby starts college!
✨ Esme starts Year 8!
WHEN THE F**K DID THAT HAPPEN?!🥹
I couldn’t be prouder of them both ❤️
And finally, to say thank you to everyone who has stuck around while life has been throwing all kinds of s**t at me…
You can get 10% OFF on the website until 8pm on Friday! 🛍️
Use code: THANKYOU
Now, if my body could kindly stop throwing random plot twists at me for five f**king minutes, that would be absolutely f**king fantastic - let’s embrace the “ber” months! 🍂🎃🧡