09/08/2026
LIMITED TIME
"BOUNTY" TRADE-IN:
Tired of neighborhood watchers that never blink?
Bring a freshly harvested, wild-caught Flock camera to the front counter today and trade it for a free suppressor tax stamp (or heavily discounted can).
Rules:
Must be free-range and ethically plucked from its pole habitat.
Solar panel included gets you a free box of subsonic ammo.
Please turn it off before entering; our showroom already has trust issues.
(Disclaimer: For legal, satirical, and strictly hypothetical reasons, please leave the city’s bird-watching tech alone.)