11/19/2020
𝑆𝑜𝑚𝑒 𝑚𝑜𝑟𝑛𝑖𝑛𝑔𝑠 𝑐𝑜𝑚𝑒 𝑤𝑖𝑡ℎ 𝑎 𝑛𝑒𝑤 𝑠𝑜𝑓𝑡𝑒𝑛𝑖𝑛𝑔, 𝑎 𝑙𝑒𝑡𝑡𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑔𝑜 𝑜𝑓 𝑎 𝑡𝑖𝑔ℎ𝑡 𝑔𝑟𝑖𝑝 𝑖 ℎ𝑒𝑙𝑑, 𝑜𝑛𝑙𝑦 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑛𝑖𝑔ℎ𝑡 𝑏𝑒𝑓𝑜𝑟𝑒...
have you had these mornings love? The ones where you wake up realizing that something is now permanently in the past?
And you held on for so long, you physically feel the shift and maybe even a slight ache in your heart? Things will never be the same, not all bad, but life is moving forward and there’s nothing I can do to stop it.
Last night we had “a talk” with my son. (No not THAT one... that’s been long done), but one where we lost a bit of trust in him bc of a choice he made.
It’s ok, it’s normal, we knew this exploration of who he wants to become was beginning.
𝐵𝑢𝑡 𝑤ℎ𝑎𝑡 𝐼 𝑑𝑖𝑑𝑛’𝑡 𝑒𝑥𝑝𝑒𝑐𝑡... Was the realization of the REASON he felt he needed to be sneaky & push back. 𝐼 𝑤𝑎𝑠 ℎ𝑜𝑙𝑑𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑜𝑛 𝑡𝑜𝑜 𝑡𝑖𝑔ℎ𝑡𝑙𝑦.
I forgot he wasn’t a kid anymore. I forgot that his friends are now becoming as important, if not more at times, as family. I forgot that his friendships are no longer elementary “hi, let’s be best buds” 5 seconds into meeting. They are becoming REAL friendships.
So this morning, I felt the softening in my being. And I knew today brought a new chapter in my family. One navigating a pre-teen heart. (I’m not crying, you’re crying! 😭).
I want him to know his voice matters. I want to have a mutual respect. Yes there are consequences for being dishonest. But I also had to admit I was wrong & that I failed to HEAR what he was actually saying. “Mom, I’m not a kid anymore, these people matter to me. Stop thinking this isn’t a big deal to me.”
Ugh... any mamas out there feeling me??🙋🏼♀️
So today I will morn my baby boy a little and be excited for this new chapter of communication, guidance, growth together, respect & learning along with him who he’s becoming. 💕
For books to help your kiddo navigate these emotions, check my story!
✨ ***en