03/09/2021
THE 20 BEST THINGS ABOUT BEING A MOTHER
"One of the things I personally love about motherhood is how, as a writer, itās enabled me to build a career upon complaining about motherhood. But there are actually just as many cool things about my new life. Such as...
1. The kids
Obviously, unconditional love, yada yada, Iām putting this down first so you donāt report me to Social Services even though #5 is clearly way better.
2. Super-productivity
Iāve become so good at multitasking, I can basically bend time. (Iām writing this sitting on the loo while brushing my teeth with one hand, sending a text with the other and singing Old Macdonald.)
3. Cake
All the time. I donāt know why this is part of it, but it is.
4. W**e
Much of the time. I do know why this is part of it, but any excuse etc.
5. Parent and child parking
So long, suckers.
6. An excuse to be fat for nine months
My tummy always stuck out so I spent my pregnancy in bodycon dresses going, āItās not my fault I donāt look like Posh Spice! Iām up the duff!ā
7. Tiny socks
Makes the fiddly process of hanging them on the line bearable. Also tiny vests, tiny trousers, tiny dresses.
8. Sunny afternoons in the park
Maternity leave isnāt all good, but there are times itās great not to be in an office.
9. Making them laugh
The first time my baby and I shared a real joke (being honest, I think it was her joke) made having mastitis 72 times totally worth it.
10. Community
Until your baby has been completely kitted out by gifts from everyone you know and some you donāt, like your mumās friend from the Rotary Club or your work colleagueās mum, you have no idea how kind people are. Strangers help you up stairs with a pram. They talk to you on public transport. They pull stupid faces to cheer your child up when itās screaming on a plane. I'd always liked to think it, but now I'm sure: people are, at root, good.
11. An excuse to be late
āSorry! You know what itās like, had to change nappy on the way out of the doorā¦ā AKA I decided to put makeup on for once in my life.
12. An excuse not to travel
āCan you come to us? Itās so tricky travelling with a babyā¦ā
13. An excuse not to do anything you donāt want to do, basically
āItās a no-questions-asked way out of almost all social events that suck big time in favour of another episode of House of Cards on Netflix,ā says my friend Matt, whoās actually a dad but let's be honest has nailed one of the biggest perks of a mum's job.
14. Sleepy cuddles
15. Christmas
Suddenly has a point again. (Plus, friends inform me, you can now host it if you want to.)
16. The ability to sleep anywhere
ANYWHERE. Planes. Office chairs. I used to suffer from insomnia but now if I just pick up this cushion here Iāll immediately asfdvcklm ,
Sorry, fell asleep.
17. The chance of going to a nicer nursing home
My toddler has no idea why I always make her play āinvestment bankersā, mwahaha.
18. Mother's Day
āItās like having two birthdays!ā says my friend Amy, leaving me wondering whether she has an exceptionally good Mother's Day or an exceptionally rubbish birthday.
19. Other mothers
That moment when you look at someone and you just know what sheās feeling, and she knows you know? And somehow thatās enough? This has probably been the biggest, best change in my life since becoming a mum (alright, alright, except for 1). My local baby group is not an obvious group of friends; weāre all pretty different, but weāve been in the trenches together these past few years and that is an unbreakable bond. If you mess with any of those women I WILL END YOU.
20. Bedtime"
Source of Article: Emma Bartley / getthegloss.com